In similar fashion to your female counterparts, the groomsmen, will have some work to do helping the groom prep in the months, weeks and days leading up to his big day.
Before the Wedding
Some of your roles and responsibilities will include:
It is expected of the groomsmen to help the groom pick his suit. Usually the bride will have given this particular outing some kind of direction (i.e. pick a black suit, or a blue suit), but occasionally the groom will have 100% free reign and then it becomes the groomsmen’s responsibility to prevent the groom from going too radical on his wedding day.
If he does not regularly wear paisley and cowboy boots, his wedding day is not the day to start!
Groomsmen’s etiquette dictates that the groomsmen pay for their own suits. Usually you can get away with hiring something or wearing a suit you already own – either way, cough up the cash for necessary hires/tailoring and thank your lucky stars your suit doesn’t cost what the bridesmaids’ dresses cost!
Make sure you have your suit tailored to fit the body you have and not the body you wish you had! Same goes for the groom; make sure he buys a suit that fits him, not a future him he may or may not sculpt into being before the wedding.
Plan the Bachelor party along with the Best Man. As a groomsman it is your responsibility to help brainstorm, budget and plan for the bachelor party.
You and the rest of the groom’s entourage will likely split all the costs and you want to know your budget has been taken into account when planning so make sure you’re involved from the get-go. While some bachelor parties are all about raunchy late-night gallivanting, these days many more modern men are opting to forego the traditional “last night of freedom” bit and doing something more low-key and laid back with their mates before tying the knot.
While it is your responsibility as groomsman to support the groom and to be there for him to celebrate his transition from bachelorhood, gone are the days when marriage was considered the end of one’s freedom – you don’t need to compromise on your personal morals and neither does the groom.
If he says “no strippers”, respect his wishes; and if he wants strippers and you’re not down with that lifestyle, it is perfectly acceptable for you to decline to attend. Offer to take the hungover party out for breakfast the next morning, or join them for one drink before they head to the strip club instead.
Help the groom plan the honeymoon. If the groom needs any help with admin or ideas pertaining to the honeymoon; the groomsmen are his go-to guys. If you are married and have done this before, your experience may prove invaluable to the groom!
Pro Tip: Ask the bridesmaids to do some digging for you so that you can ascertain what the bride is really hoping to do on her honeymoon and that way you can help steer the groom in the right direction.
Day of the Wedding
The groomsmen’s duties on the day of the wedding are minimal.
Make sure you are well-dressed, well-groomed and on time.
And for heaven’s sake make sure the groom is all of the above as well!
You may be asked to escort a bridesmaid down the aisle, or you may be standing up with the groom at the front of the venue from the get go. Have some tissues handy, especially if you know the bride or groom are criers! They’ll thank you for it later!
Dance the night away! Pay special attention to the single ladies who look like they’d love to dance but find themselves sans partner! It is your responsibility to make sure everybody is out on the dance floor and having fun!